by Dee McLachlan
We have just intercepted a government memo outlining a new National Framework for Protecting Australia’s children going into the future.
The objective, it seems, is to keep children safe. The safety procedures for children and adults need detailed scrutiny and analysis, and the Committee on Child Safety Protocols, CCSP, will perform this task nobly. It will work with Federal and State governments to implement a comprehensive national approach to safeguarding our children in their “best interests.”
To quote the CEO of CCSP: “It’s an ambitious, long-term national approach to ensuring the safety and well-being of children in Australia for the next two decades.”
The gender-binary CEO continued:
“The aim is to deliver a substantial and sustained reduction in levels of risk and perceived risk — in the areas of potential emotional abuse, harm or attitudinal dysfunction. We must make sure all children are 100% safe at all times.”
A key principle will apply in all decision-making: “safety is paramount.” This coupled with a focus on training parents (now called “bio-guardians”) into the new safety disciplines adopted by government agencies. To ensure maximum intake and proficiency of safety procedures, bio-guardians will be fined for breaking certain safety codes.
Recommendations
The CCSP has put forward a number of recommendations to Canberra, to be rolled out in the next few years. The following is a sample:
- From 2022, all tree climbing will be banned. Any parent allowing a child to climb a tree knowingly or unknowingly will have that child removed. (Anything over 1 meter will be considered climbing.)
- Cycling for young children — under the age of 10 — will be phased out over the next three years. All bicycles will be registered from 2023, and microchipped for tracking purposes. This is for the safety of teens.
NO hands means no bike. The child has been removed from a dangerous home and parenting to a ‘safe’ environment. “Safety” is more important than “fun” says the new CEO.
- That GPS tracking system will ensure that all bicycles keep to the allocated cycle routes only. (All cycle helmets will have to pass the new titanium-impact standards.)
- All swings and slides will be removed from schools and parks by 2025. These will be replaced with ground-level play facilities such as rocking chairs and exercise stretchers will be on double-rubber matting.
Considering that the main activities that are dangerous to Australian children are horse riding, swimming, cycling, trampolines and sport, new regulations monitoring those activities will be brought into place.
- Backyard trampolines will be banned from July 2021, and all trampoline play-centre facilities will be strictly supervised with revised limits to “safe participation.” A bounce-ratio and jounce-impact analysis is presently being determined by computer neuro-modeling schematics — by the company Hallibounceton.
To prevent swimming fatalities, all persons under 18 will be required to wear the new “E-skin-flato” when swimming — even in competition. These new ultra-thin life jackets are not only GPS-tracked but can detect oxygen intake declines. The life jacket is automatically triggered, via osmoregulation, to inflate. The initial trial resulted in several deaths as the emergency-skin-flatos caused unexpected strangulation, but the new design is expected to save tens of thousands of lives.
To quote the CEO of CCSP:
“Unfortunately there were a number of deaths during the trial, but thankfully no one drowned. The inflatos are to prevent drownings, and we plan to keep your kids safe whether in or out of bio-guardian care.”
New home regulations will be rolled out, covering child-fun activities like cooking and baking, and the preparing of raw-food option treats will be favoured. The proximity to kettles and stoves will also be regulated.
Bio-guardian and New Commissioner
The CCSP is participating in the appointment of a new position in this sector — that of the Child Safety Commissioner. This position will oversee the Child Safety Deputies, and the taking over of the parenting of children by the state. To quote the new commissioner, “Children are Australia’s resource of the future. We need to keep our clients safe.”
The Guardian-Training Program adopted by protection agencies will be carefully monitored by a new public-private partnership with SERCO-KIDS. The Canberra government is excited about this new initiative, as it will dramatically boost jobs growth over the next five years.
It is envisaged that 35,000 new “controllers” will be stationed across the country to monitor children’s safety, and these persons, known as “Child Safety Deputies,” will report directly to protection agencies. No warrants will be required for the Deputies to enter homes, schools or childcare centres to surveil the children and their guardians or bio-guardians.
There is already legislation in place that removes parental rights as the child enters Child Care facilities, but further legislation will be passed, deeming that the safety of children is a matter for the state, and therefore all parents are appointed-guardians by default.
It’s an ambitious and bold plan. When asked whether this might lead to the “coddling” of kids — making them unable to deal with risk, the CEO replied,
“As adults, we don’t need to climb trees, so it’s unnecessary for kids to do so. For arborists the government has a specialized training program and licence requirements. Anyway, there’s a new tree climbing App for kids that is much safer. Plus they can compete with other climbing friends on the App.”
Growth Industry
Today’s number of Australian kids in “Out of Home Care,” is 56,000 — and the target for 2035 is 1.5 million children removed from “dangerous” homes. This will not only boost growth indicators for government financials, but it will help this profitable sector to grow accordingly.
Best of all, it will inevitably keep children safe.
[SATIRE, but too close for comfort.]
Tell me that is satire! In the mixed up over regulated world we live in at the moment, with globalist PC & Agenda driven tyranny running rampant, makes it that you couldn’t assume something like this is satire anymore!
Are these idiots for real????
These ideas are even worse than those brought up in the book 1984. Big Brother stupidity!
Seeing that the Globalists are closing down all productive industry, they have to come up with moronic ideas to create new industries, whereby nothing is produced but jobs are created for a number of people to be shepherds (herdsters, drovers, minders) of the remaining population.
Where is our food and utensils for everyday life, to come from?
Bio-guardians. What next? I know that the Rothschild Family is being overseen by a person of age, but is he suffering dementia? This idiotic program seems like a Rothschild or Rockefeller nightmare.
“Unfortunately there were a number of deaths during the trial, but thankfully no one drowned. The inflatos are to prevent drownings, and we plan to keep your kids safe whether in or out of bio-guardian care.” This sounds like the organisers really know what is best for the kids. Looks as though dead kids don’t drown. Thank goodness for that! How could anybody leave their children in the care of such a person that made the above comment?
What this program is about, is to make sure children gain no life skills and will always be dependent on Big Brother. I imagine all the costs to implement this nightmare will be placed on the family (sorry bio-guardians) and the taxpayer.
There is a connection between this story and the article of Rosa Koire of two days ago.
Looks like they don’t want kids playing full stop, especially outdoors. Why, when they can be locked in high rise cubicles watching abominations on the net and nagging their parents for the new $3500 iPhone. Nothing quite like diversity in a cell. The great deception has become the great replacement.
On the other side, look at kids in rural and coastal areas. They are fit as, playing outdoors surfing fishing climbing riding gathering farming running, happy. Sure, they get grazes, but are aware of their surroundings in the school of life. Something our masters seemed to be absolutely opposed to. Wonder why?
This is Satire.
I would hope so. However looking at how things have changed, not for the better, in my lifetime, I don’t know.
Difficult to tell these days. All part of dr day
I am still trying to get my head around the quote “Unfortunately there were a number of deaths during the trial, but thankfully no one drowned”……WHAT?? Who did they test this on? Who DIED? What the hell???!!!!! I just rode past my local playground and the swings have gone. 5G is upon us. China’s using facial recognition technology and constantly monitoring citizens. Belgium will supposedly have control of UKs police force after October…And kids can be taken from their parents for riding a bike or climbing a tree??!!! The world’s gone mental!!
Rachel, I wrote this as a satirical piece to lead up to the real thing. It should say “category – satire” — but actually it is so close to what is happening.
Swings gone? Wow. I have seen the playground slowly change.
I will post the real figures shortly as a comment. My made up quote:
“Unfortunately there were a number of deaths during the trial, but thankfully no one drowned”
typifies the thinking of government.
they dont make playgrounds like they used to…
Did you ever go on the teeter-totter, Fair?
yep.. I was a real risk taker in the day.
And here’s how pathetic Monash playground became:
https://www.tripadvisor.com.au/Attraction_Review-g6163137-d258387-Reviews-Monash_Adventure_Park-Monash_South_Australia.html#photos;aggregationId=101&albumid=101&filter=7&ff=247715979
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the beds of the safety jihadists involved.
Artificial intelligence sole purpose is to destroy goodness.
And here we are with a certain school in W.A. recently RE-INTRODUCING all the above BANNED proposals, then discovering the kids have actually progressed mentally and physicaly, imagine that ?
As socialism is wholly dependent on the very human qualities it condemns it can only ever go so far.
I realize Dee MEANT TO BE writing a satire. However, while wrapping fish in a newspaper (September 2019’s The Bow Times, in New Hampshire), I noticed this:
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS NOW ON STEROIDS IN SAN FRANCISCO AND NEW HAMPSHIRE
by Chuck Douglas
The words “felon,” “offender,” “convict,” “addict” and “juvenile delinquent” would be part of the past in official San Francisco lingo under its new “person first” language guidelines adopted by the city’s Board of Supervisors in July.
Someone once called a convicted felon or an offender released from jail will now be a “formerly incarcerated person,” or a “justice-involved” person or, even better, simply a “returning resident.” Parolees and people on criminal probation will be referred to as “persons under supervision.”
“We don’t want people to be forever labeled for the worst things that they have done,” Supervisor Matt Haney said in pushing the changes.
Columnist, Phil Matier, in the San Francisco Chronicle for August 11, 2019, posed the question of how you would describe someone whose car was broken into by a recently released offender, on parole with a drug problem?
His answer was simple. “A person who has come in contact with a returning resident who was involved with the justice system and who is currently under supervision with a history of substance abuse.”
New Hampshire has its own political correctness in changed terminology for divorce parenting issues. “Custody” in the new parenting schedule forms is out. Neither parent shall be described as having the child “reside primarily” with him or her or as having “primary residential responsibility”.
The new phrase is residential responsibility and parenting. — end of news article
So, Dee, you thought you were being humorous?
Rachel asks: “Kids can be taken from their parents for riding a bike or climbing a tree??”
Rachel, kids can be taken in Oz today for far, far less than that. You might say they can be taken away for breathing.
They can be taken away for loving them (too much).
It’s getting queerer and queerer. But don’t worry, we are going to stop this nonsense.
.
Says Orwell:
.
“It’s a beautiful thing, the destruction of words. Of course the great wastage is in the verbs and adjectives, but there are hundreds of nouns that can be got rid of as well. It isn’t only the synonyms; there are also the antonyms.
After all, what justification is there for a word which is simply the opposite of some other words? A word contains its opposite in itself. Take ‘good,’ for instance. If you have a word like ‘good,’ what need is there for a word like ‘bad’? ‘Ungood’ will do just as well–better, because it’s an exact opposite, which the other is not.
Or again, if you want a stronger version of ‘good,’ what sense is there in having a whole string of vague useless words like ‘excellent’ and ‘splendid’ and all the rest of them? ‘Plusgood’ covers the meaning, or ‘doubleplusgood’ if you want something stronger still…In the end the whole notion of goodness and badness will be covered by only six words–in reality, only one word.
Don’t you see the beauty of that, Winston?”
Seems to me like a plan set in place by the Child Protection Services and Family Courts to secure more victims for the massive pedophile industry
Wayne, so what else is new?
OMG children can be placed in the full care of their abusers by the family courts and child protection can completely ignore all of the childs abuse and torture however children will be removed if they climb a tree or fall off a bike !!!
Not yet FFS. This is satire, but we getting close to this.
I agree
At 6.30, Chelsea says Mom is still not locked up.
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Bit off track but important I believe:
Alan Simmons ITNJ Testimony – NZ Ecocide
https://commission.itnj.org/2019/09/16/alan-simmons-testimony-ecocide/